Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Right Beside Me

I've seen it and felt it, hopelessness with no lifeline.  The wicked are feeding on innocence and our decline.  You and I we are the same, torn apart by different things.  All our faith is barely alive, but we're going to make it through the night.  I want you to know... when the world is on your back, and you think that you will never last; when you're lonely and you are confused - I'll be right beside you.  When the walls are closing in, and you think you'd rather sink than swim; when you think there's nothing left for you to lose - I'll be right beside you.  I'll be with you.  We are precious.  More than priceless is our worth.  Loved by the Father, Heaven's children here on earth.  You and I we are the same, lifted up above the pain.  By it's wounds we have been healed, and by our love it is revealed.  I want you to know (I need you to know)... when the world is on your back, and you think that you will never last; when you're lonely and you are confused - I'll be right beside you.  When the walls are closing in, and you think you'd rather sink than swim; when there's nothing left for you to lose - I'll be right beside you.  Hold on, don't you let go of me.  I'll be here through it all.  Hold on, when you're ready to fall.  I will carry you.  I will never leave you.  I will lift you if you fall.  When the world is on your back, and you think that you will never last; when you're lonely and you are confused - I'll be right beside you.  When the walls are closing in, and you think you'd rather sink than swim; when there's nothing left for you to lose - I'll be right beside you.  I'll be with you.  I'll be right beside you... (Building 429)

So this wasn't the song I had in mind when I thought about writing again, but it is the one I needed to write about.  Funny how things work that way, you know?  I guess it wasn't really up to me to begin with (not that many times it ever is...)

Along my life's journey (38 years and counting), I've encountered any number of people.  Some have stayed.  Some have left.  Some I never got a chance to know, and wish I would have.  Some I know intimately, and am blessed to share their deepest secrets, desires and dreams.  Some have stuck it out with me since the beginning and don't look like they're leaving anytime soon (crazy, crazy people - lol).  But through it all, there has always been one right beside me that knows more about me than anyone, including my parents or my husband.  I don't think I need to spell it out for you, so I won't.

When I look back, He has always been there.  Good/bad.  Ups/downs.  Funny/sad.  You name it.  His voice is almost always quiet and His presence doesn't always make itself known, but I know He is there.  I don't always talk to Him, but He is always listening.  I don't always acknowledge Him, but He is always there.  He doesn't care how stubborn I am.  Or even how smart (or dumb) I am.  He doesn't care about my social status, my hair (frizzy brown), my weight (a work in progress), how tall (5' 9") or short I am.  He doesn't care about my occupation (Exec. Asst.) or what kind of car (minivan) I drive.  He doesn't care about any of those things.  He just cares about ME.  Tiffany Anne Updegrove.  Wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend.  He has seen my darkest days, and He has seen my best days.  He has watched me fail, and He has watched me succeed.  He has picked me up, and He has even carried me on those occasions when I was just to weak to do it on my own.  His love is real and pure.  The most unconditional love there is.  And I am blessed to have it, even though I don't always appreciate it or understand why it's been given to me...

I'm so thankful to have this relationship with Him and wish that all my relationships were so unconditional.  Constant, often quiet, sometimes funny, sometimes bold, but always there.  Never critical, but supportive and uplifting.  No matter what I look like on any given day, or how many mistakes I make, He is there, right beside me.  Usually, His presence is unassuming, but sometimes it's like getting punched in the gut!  Without judgement or criticism.  Just pure, unconditional love.  How humbling is it to think that even though He knows everything there is to know about me, and all the mistakes I have made in my life, He loves me just the way I am and is always right beside me.  He hasn't given up on me.  He won't.  He hasn't quit on me.  He can't.  I am a work in progress.  I am me, and he is right beside me.  Peace.